Women's Wiles or Leadership responsibility?

I see that time has gotten away once again. I could make a lot of excuses as to why I have neglected this blog. But they would all boil down to just that...neglect. Not paying attention to things that are important. Choosing my own priorities over those of others. All with good intentions, mind you!

This delemna reminds me of a passage that I recently read with my grandson. We are going through the study of the children of Israel and the life of Moses. Two very important people in Moses's life were his siblings, Aaron and Miriam. We read the story of how they both decided to grumble against Moses because he had married a woman that did not meet with their approval. Her ancestry and upbringing did not fit with their idea of the wife of a leader of Israel. Miriam was struck with leporsy for her transgression. Yet, nothing is mentioned of Aaron having the same situation. This had puzzled me in the past, having read that passage as more of an isolated story. But in the context of the whole journey, and the life of Moses, it makes mch more sense to me.

You see, Aaron and Miriam had differing personalities. Miriam was bold, out-spoken and a natural leader. She was quick to express herself with dancing and singing when her heart felt gratitude for God. She was quick to offer a solution when Moses, as an infant, was pulled from the water to be raised in the palace.

Aaron, on the other hand, became Moses's spokesman only after Moses demanded it of God. He was much more of a follower than a leader, in my opinion. He was not a leader independently of Moses. When Moses was gone up to the Mount to meet with God, Aaron gave in to the wishes of the people and created the golden calf for them to worship. It seems he couldn't keep his focus on the Lord without Moses being there, even though he had himself seen God's victory over the Pharoah!

Could it be that the verse which cautions those who consider themselves teachers (leaders) could fit this scenario too? The Word warns that if we are teachers, then more is expected of us. Aaron seemed unable to stand up for the right thing unless Moses was present. He apparently accepted his leadership postion reluctantly. Miriam, on the other hand, did consider herself a leader and spoke up often. Perhpas this leadership quality is why she was judged more harshly than Aaron in their joint sin against Moses.

Aaron was a people-please champion! But this also meant his heart was soft towards others! He begged God to heal Miriam and take away the awfulness she was facing. God knew his heart was full of love for his sister, but he had succumbed, once again, to the desires of others.

Miriam received mercy from God. She was banned from the community as any leper was, but only for seven days. Her healing was complete. It does not appear that she suffered any lingering effects of the illness.

I thought about this story and realized that leadership is an awesome responsibility. Sometimes it gets thrust upon us like Aaron. Soemtimes it is a part of our nature like Miriam. Either way, we should consider that our priorities can no longer be the number one consideration of our lives. We must have God's priorities. We must say what He wants us too and not value our own opinions over His instructions.

So what do I need to consider in this story? To pray for the leadership that God has put over me. To not judge the actions or decisions of others, especially those in position over me spiritually. To speak when and what He says and not my own opinions. To not crave the attention of others, even those whom I might naturally lead. To keep my opinions from coming out of my mouth, except when speaking directly to God alone. And to not find God's decisions "unfair". He deals with each of us as He knows is best for our growth.

Miriam was a good leader in worship. But she apparently felt the need to seek attention by gossip. Oh Lord...keep your arm around my shoulder...and Your hand over my mouth! I submit my words to You to use! Amen!

THE MARBLE CRACKED

I remember my childhood days. The simple games we played; the imaginary worlds we created. Sometimes I wish I could return to those worlds where Prince Charming rode in on his white stallion or the tall, dark, and handsome stranger took hold of my hand and whisked me away. But, I have put away childish things and faced the realities of life. Still, one childhood game lingers in my mind. I think it haunts reality at times. This game is marbles.

I used to play by the hour with my marbles, rolling the large one into the helpless plain ones and watching them all spin out of control. It seemed funny then. Now that I am grown, I relate all too well that large boulder marble. I’ve discovered being tossed into a heap of offenses, resulting in my world spinning out of control is not funny at all.

One day my grandmother took my favorite boulder because it had a nick in it. She baked it in her over, shattering the inside, Such a beautiful necklace it made! I could no longer use it for a boulder, but now it served a much better purpose.

The heat of life’s difficulties and discouragements has made me shattered inside as well. My heart has been deeply wounded by the fires of betrayal and I have been crushed on the inside. But just as that marble didn’t disintegrate but only shattered inwardly, I too, held strong because my true fomr is in God’s hands. My heart belongs to Him first and not to fickle man. He can take my shattered heart, held firmly and securely in His hand, and make me an adornment for His wearing. He can make a jewel out of a confused and broken marble.

That boulder went from being kept in a crowded bag of marbles to being displayed in a lovely jewelry box. Isn’t that just like Jesus? He talks us from the stuffy, dark, crowded, sinful “pouches” to His jewelry display! In other words, He takes us from the common to the extraordinary! I am very glad He owns my heart!

No Sales Rack!

NO SALES RACK!

I love to shop! What woman doesn’t, at least a little bit, enjoy a trip to the mall? I even love it at Christmas, in the hustle and bustle of the season. I especially enjoy a good sale. “Never pay full price” has been my shopping motto since I had money to spend. After all, you can get more items if you find good sales. I have even gotten good at spotting bargains at yard sales. Items of discard can be of great value. Everywhere I go to shop, I find a “sales” rack.

One morning my agenda included a trip to the mall. Anticipating great deal, my mind was calculating when the Holy Spirit interrupted.
“What about your prayer time with Me?”

“Oh yes” I answered quickly, “I’ll stop by the church and spend time with You first.”

Little did I know that my compulsion for sales would be the very toold that God would use to deepen my commitment to Him. I was worshipping Him, caught up in the glory of His presence. He whispered a question, “Daughter, will you pay the price to serve Me and answer the call on your life?”

I knew what He meant. He wanted me to write, to teach, to serve in a churchfilled with PEOPLE! How to not fall into people-pleasing and yet meet their needs was indeed a challenge! Yet, I love challenges…

“Yes, Lord” I replied. “I will pay the price!”

“You don’t understand”, He said. “There are no sales racks in My kingdom. I’m talking FULL PRICE!”

Total silence hit my spirit as I pondered what He meant. I knew it meant trusting Him in and through and for everything. It could mean not questioning His decision to take one of my loved ones home. It could mean facing tremendous persecution. It certainly meant dying to my own ambitions and myself. If I said yes, I knew I had given Him all authority to grow in me and do with me whatever He desired. THAT was a very sobering thought!

I walked around the sanctuary several times weeping. I guess we all want some control over our lives. He was asking me to give up mine. But since I love Him, what choice should I have? I want all He has for me. And how could He expect less? He gave everything for me.

“Yes, Lord,” I answered. “I understand. And I will pay the price; the full price, whatever that may mean. I love You. I trust You.”

Serving Jesus is costly. He has taken me through many fiery trials since that day. I am sure there are more to come. But He has proven faithful. He has walked beside me in the furnaces of life. He is worthy of paying the FULL price for!

The Eroding Rock

Drip. Drip. Drip. The water splashed rhythmically on the rock. At first, it was like a refreshing spray, bouncing off the solid stone, and evaporating into the fresh air.

Plop. Plop. Plop. Day after day. Week after week. The constant dripping of the water was no longer pleasant, but annoying and destructive. The constant drops began to wear a hole in the rock. Rocks, as solid as they appear, can be worn down by the constant dripping of the seemingly much softer element of water. And rocks cannot repair themselves like flesh. Once the hole is formed, it cannot be restored.

Life can be much like this dripping of water. Repeated offenses. On-going attacks. Constant annoying reminders of hurts and mistakes of the past can wear a hole right through our hearts. The solid foundations of our minds and hearts cannot escape the erosion of the drippings of betrayal, loss, and consequences of sin, be it ours, or others. At times, we can feel much like that rock with a hole in the center. Irreparable. Unable to be the same again.

And yet, what happens to these rocks with holes? They become collectors’ treasures! They are sought out by those who desire to lift them out of the pile of stones in the river’s bottom, and make them into wondrous jewelry fit for display on the neck or wrist of a King.

Isn’t that just like Jesus? He seeks the lost and wounded; the ones with holes from the drippings of offense, and lifts them out of the miry clay. He cleans them with His breath and polishes them with His hands. He takes us from the raging river bottom to the jewelry box of the King!

“Lord, help us to realize that when we feel helpless and “holey” that You are there to makes us whole and lovely and an adornment for Your glory. Amen.”


By Charlotte Saben 2000

MOUNTAINS OR MOLEHILLS

Remember the old saying, “You could make a mountain out of a molehill?” I heard it many times from my mother and my husband who both felt “led” of God to point out my frustrations.

One day, angry at this comment and feeling as though my “mountain” was being down-sized rather than the other way around. I went to the only comfort that really lasts. God. His word is a comfort to my soul. He understands l ike no other! That is why He is called the Wonderful Counselor!

I discovered in my reading that God addresses mountains, but He doesn’t mention molehills. Could it be because He knows our finite minds tend perceive monumental mountains when He sees them as simple challenges?
We trip on, or fall into, the molehills we do not obviously see. But mountains overwhelm us. Perhaps they make us turn to Him.

He speaks to the problem of mountains. He says that if we have faith WE can speak to this mountain and tell it to be cast into the sea. AND IT WILL BE DONE! I had always thought this passage to bee strange, since I had not seen nor heard of anyone moving any mountains.

Now I began to correlate this analogy. The mountains I make, perhaps out of molehills at times, can be driven into the sea of God’s forgiveness and love. The key is, I must trust Him. I must have faith. And faith is the substance of things not seen and evidence of things hoped for! I had to envision my problems as mountains and then cast them into the sea in order to gain god’s perspective on the matter.

The Bible also tells us that God gives His people hinds feet to leap OVER the mountains of life. I began to see that there were perceived mountains in my life that I could not yet speak to. I could not face them. They overwhelmed me in my weakness. But I could come to the Mountain of Calvary. Kneel at the feet of my Lord, and receive hinds’ feet to leap over or climb in the midst of the mountain. I could gain a higher perspective.

I realized that often I choose to ignore hurts and offenses. Though this seems like a godly solution, it turns often into a pesky molehill, causing me to trip and twist my ankle in my walk with God. But allowing myself to perceive them as they felt, truly like a mountain, at the foot of the Cross, can give me hinds’ feet or faith to speak to the pain and see it truly brought down.

Thank you Jesus, for Mount Calvary and for the mountains in my life. May all my molehills turn to mountains!

In Tune With Him

In Tune With Him

“I am absolutely right!” Those were my feelings as well, but they came from the mouth of another. And we did not agree.

She was a person whom God had given to help in the children’s ministry that I was directly responsible for.

I wanted to argue the point and to remind her who was “in charge”, but I had long ago realized that falling into that trap does not further the Kingdom. So, I went to the King instead.

I often spent time in the sanctuary of the church where I was on staff, and walked around while I prayed. And God had a tremendous lesson in store for me that day.

I felt very impressed to go to a specific corner and stand facing the pews. I looked around at the pews and the grand piano and other instruments.

Following what I felt was a leading of the Holy Spirit, I went from one corner to the next, gazing out at the sanctuary fixtures and furnishings.

In one particular corner, I realized that I did not have the view of the piano. (The room was neither rectangular nor square). One could stand here and effectively argue that there was NO piano in the room if they refused to move out of their corner.

That’s when it hit me! She was NOT in the same corner as I was! Her view point differed greatly because she was standing in a different place than I was. She did not see the “piano” which seemed so obvious to me!

I realized too, that only God could move her beyond her corner to a wider view. It was HIS job, not mine. That settled it. I should continue to do what was right…play my piano, so to speak, and let God move her. If she complained about the music, it was His business to lead her to the piano. I could argue all day and night and never make her see the piano. She would be moved only by God.

I received peace that day. I was right! So was she! God had us in different corners, which created different perspectives! So, I prayed that some day she would see the piano and enjoy the music! And I think she did…in His time!

The Greatness of God

God is great! I have heard and said that since I was a little child. The truth is instilled in my heart. Along life's path I have encountered many people who have struggled with greatness. Some expressed this with egotistical actions. Others have denied the greatness within them, not believing they could attain to their dreams. They became unwilling or unable to reach beyond the obvious. Unfortunately, I have fallen into that catagory a good deal of my life. I am determined to get out of that pit forever!

Some people who reach for the stars, so to speak, are dubbed manic or crazy or dreamers. Most find that their friends do not believe in them and their dreams. Take Joseph for example. He had God-given dreams and yet his own brothers did not believe him! He, like so many before and after him, could not shake the drive for greatness. Joseph was thrown into a pit, mostly by the decisions of others. Perhaps one could fault him for not using wisdom in his bragging about his dreams. But even so, it was the decision of his brothers that landed him in a pit and ultimately, a foreign country and prison!

He could have chosen bitterness. He would have been justified by most people, to have screamed "Unfair!" at the top of his lungs. And the pit was not the end of his woes. He suffered humiliation at the hands of a lustful woman. He chose to do the right thing and ended up in prison. And all this because of the greatness of God and His plan for Joseph!

I have thought about my life. I had youthful dreams and apsirations which I now believe were God-given. Much of my life I chose to listen to the opionions of others instead of reaching for the fulfillment of those dreams. It started with simple teasing about my birth date..Friday the thirteen. It went on from there, though, looking back, I am perplexed as to what made me desire the opinion of others over the greatness of God. Yes, I got glasses in fourth grade. I was a bit clumsy and bumped into things a lot. But I also was smart, fairly athletic, and had a nice home and friends. I tried to share my vision with others. Even my parents did not believe in God's greatness within my heart. My mother constantly reminded me "not to think more highly" of myself than I ought! She highlighted that verse in my Bible, along with the one about "doing all things without murmuring or complaining".

While I believe to this day, that I should honor my parents, I realize now they had a limited perspective, based in their own fears and doubts and misguided teaching. It has taken me a very long time to become comfortable with myself...to believe in those youthful dreams again!

Joseph served God in the pit, in the prison, and in the foreign country. He held onto the vision of greatness until God brought it to fruition! While I have not always had the same attitude as Joseph, I have served God to the best of my understanding. I realize now that He brought me out of a pit, bought me for His service, and led me into a number of foreign circumstances...( uncomfortable, unusual, and different from the way I was reared). But He has never left me, not has He changed His mind about HIS greatness in me.

One day Joseph's brothers realized God's hand on his life. They were the recipients of God's greatness through Joseph. My family and even my friends, as well as yours, may never recognize His greatness in us. WE may not recognize that all the difficulties we encounter, all the heartaches, are leading us into His greatness and His plan. But God will express His greatness in and through us as we trust Him and praise Him, always recalling that it is HIS greatness that we are called to express!

Pick Your Battles

I have heard the phrase "Choose your battles" so many times that it would be impossible to count. I understood it when they were talking toddlers or teenagers...
yet somehow it has filtered into our psyche that we have the right to choose which battles to fight...and has infiltrated our politcal and religious venues with a vengence,

I have also heard quoted the very true Bible verse "No weapon formed against you shall prosper!" I have laid claim to it many times in my life. And while I am sure that many times I have avoided harm and thwarted attempts to un-do my self-esteem, I also realize that this verse has been misappropriated much.

I have heard it preached that we can lay claim to this when anyone is bothering us or threatening us. Any system. Any person. And thus, much discord has sprung up in our hearts. We can easily perceive others preparing weapons against us. By doing this, even unwittingly in our sub-conscience, we are actually providing weapons to our real enemy...satan.

If we are to grasp the meaning of this Scripture, we must not take it out of context, nor forget the basic themes of God's Word...love and holiness. "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities and rulers of darkness in heavenly places." Satan would love nothing more than for us to get our eyes off of him and on to each other as the enemy. He would love us to spend time trying to keep others from forming or using weapons against us, while in fact, he is honing his to use in full force.

He uses us! Self-pity. Self-indulgence. Self-promotion. Self-serving. Selfishness. I have noticed that the times I have found myself in a battle, so to speak, with another human being, that it does boil down to my own self being caught up in one of the above thoughts.

Jesus is our Defender. He is the only one who knows our hearts and intents. He is the great revealer of Truth. The battles that we should prepare for are direct attacks of satan, our real enemy. And the weapons he forms against us are often found within our own souls. If we keep in mind that we are wrestling against the principalities of darkness that desire our souls, it is much easier to walk in love and forgiveness of people leading to holiness and the complete blessings of God.

No person...no, not even one, is truly out to get us....it is a plot of a more cynical being...and the weapons of choice are our own minds and self-seeking ways. I am not saying that satan does not use people...oh, yes! He uses me against me...when I am weak and not walking in faith like I should. And he uses others to reinforce his attack.

No weapon formed against me shall prosper...because I will allow the Holy Spirit to renew my mind with the thoughts of Christ. I will be aware that my battles belong to Him...that MY wretling is with the enemy who wants me to not be connected to the God I choose to serve on a continuous basis.

Now that the battle plan of the enemy is discovered, and hence, spoiled, let us walk in love and holiness and peace and joy in the Spirit.

A Place to Speak My Mind!

I have never been a fan of people who seem to push their opinions on others...even when their opinions are more like facts and even very true. Having them forced on you seems counterproductive to me, based on many people I have talked with. Therefore, I have restrained my voice from being too controversial...from sounding too "preachy".

Well, I have finally concluded that I am who I am, and that a large part of who I am is very opinionated and has a lot to say...and that I am not content not to speak my mind. While I still do not want to push my opinions on anyone, they do need to be voiced and everyone can choose whatever they want to do with them.

So, starting tomorrow, or Monday at the latest, I shall begin publishing my comments from my heart. They may seem preachy at times or politically incorrect...but this is my forum. Even Jesus was politcally incorrect and He was totally correct! He offended many (and still does) just by being Himself. So, at this point in my life, I am going to do the same...beware!

Oh, yes! For those wondering about the silly name of this blog (I should have left the "u" out)...it comes from an old inside joke of my youth years related to the fact that most of my life I have been affiliated with and attended both Foursquare churches and Assemblies of God churches...so they told me I was either "Foursquembly" or "A square"...get it? I voted for the first one....